Thursday, April 26, 2007

American Idol: Idol Gives Back


American Idol: Idol Gives Back -- Again




Tonight the Idols gave back. I wanted to give back too -- my breakfast. Seriously though, in between all of the cheesiness, the filmed segments were very sad (and I'm not talking about that whole "Stayin' Alive" thing). It's a serious cause, and I even took a crowbar to my wallet and donated. Hopefully the celebrities will do the same (your "time" does not count people!).
The sappy all-star spectacular was just too much to cover, so here are just a few quick comments...
• Don't F with me about "shocking results" only to wuss out (see closing paragraph). I hate you for that Seacrest. I know you are just the producers' dancing monkey, but I blame you for tonight's lack of a surpise ending.
• Big announcement: News Corp. kicked in $5 million. Gee... think no one will get a Christmas bonus this year? Please. Speaking of which: How much of tonight's ad revenue went to the cause?
• You know it was a special episode, since Simon busted out his "other" shirt.
• Earth, Wind & Fire's opening sounded a lot like
Sexual Chocolate from "Coming to America."
• All of the Idol kids were dressed like they were going to a P Diddy party.
• I wish some celebrity would adopt those two kids living by themselves in that scary one-room "house."
• Here's to hoping that the nickname "Cresty" sticks.
• Was this the first time that
Tom from MySpace has ever been larging than a thumbnail?
• Shout out for
Captain Underpants -- awesome!
• Paula may be vertically challenged, but her boobs are not.
• Judging by the "Stayin' Alive" Ford segment, Teri Hatcher might be in need of her own Idol-style benefit.
Mickey Dolenz in the hizhouse!
• Liked Ellen as a host, but was anyone else expecting her to donate $1 million? Now that's a figure to match.
• Loved the Simpsons' segment. Seacrest must have been thrilled to finally hear Simon "sing."
• I'm pretty sure that if Elvis were alive today, he wouldn't give a rat's ass about the kids in Africa.
OK… not to sound uncharitable, but what a disappointment that no one got canned tonight. However, I did almost pass out when they made everyone think that Jordin was going home. Yeah… make the 17-year-old cry. That’s charitable. See you next week.


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